Yesterday, we visited the Jewish Community Center of MetroWest in Whippany, New Jersey, to see “Family by Family,”  an exhibit of multi-generational family portraits of Jewish families from Newark, New Jersey. I was sorry there was no docent-led tour. Without it, the people in the photos didn’t come to life. We were just looking at family albums of people we don’t know.

I wonder how many family portraits amount to just that: photos of people you don’t know. Without first-hand descriptions, there’s no way to know the people in the photos. What did their laughs sound like? What did their kitchens smell like? How did they do their hair?

My great-grandmother Belle Gott (b 1875 d 1956) wrote the briefest of memoirs about her parents. ”My Folks and I” is only three pages long. But I know my great-great grandparents because Belle describes them in physical terms. Of her father she says,  ”It was always a joy to hear my father’s rich deep voice, to catch the sound of his whistled tune as he returned from work. I believe it is a happy man who comes home whistling.” Of her mother she says: ”Her eyes were that perfect blue to complement her spouse’s dark ones. She was fair, with brown wavy hair, but she lacked the strong teeth, such as father had. She had much dental trouble and finally resigned herself to a toothless old age, and matched it with a halo of silvery wavy, bobbed hair.” Belle says they both sang and hummed as they worked, something I do all the time.  “You get your singing from them,” says my husband.

Want an easy way to write a memoir? Pick a photo of an important person in your life and describe him or her using your five senses (see, hear feel, taste, smell). You’ll bring the person to life in a way the photo never can. Here are some questions to ask:

1. What color hair? What color eyes? Tall? Short? Stocky? Thin?

2. What did these look like: Feet? Hands? Walk? Stance?

3. What did this person sound like: Voice? Intonation? Accent?

4. Characteristic speech? Favorite words or expressions?

5. Views? Attitudes? Contradictions?

Let me know how this memoir tip works for you.